Exactly a year ago today I gave up alcohol. One whole year of no prosecco, no wine, no cider, no cocktails, zip, nada, zero booze has touched these lips for an entire year. I don’t know how long you have to go without drinking alcohol before being officially classed as a non-drinker, but in my mind, after a year of no alcohol, I feel as though I have fully embraced alcohol free living and I very much intend to continue.
Don’t worry, I haven’t turned into some manic alcohol free evangelist, who believes everyone who drinks is bad. And I certainly don’t spend my nights out preaching about the benefits of alcohol free living, rolling my eyes when people get another round in and I’m still only half way through my first. This blog post isn’t about all the ways drinking alcohol is bad for you, because you know that already, right?
This isn’t about me ‘converting’ you and it’s not about me being all smug and holier than thou. Honestly, I don’t mind that people drink alcohol. As I always say, you do you. But what I do want to share with you all is my story. Because I know there are some people out there who would like to give this whole alcohol free thing a go and I’m hoping that by sharing my experience of going alcohol free for a year, it will help you if you do decide to go for it.
Why I Decided To Give Up Alcohol
I’m your fairly average 40 something year old woman. A married mum of two teens, who runs her own business from home, likes nights out, loves nights in, exercises regularly enough to keep on top of things, eats healthily enough to be happy and well, and going through the rollercoaster that is perimenopause.
Up until a year ago, I was your typical casual drinker. I’d have a drink after a tough day, I’d have a drink on a Friday night (because umm it’s Friday), and if I was going out with friends it would of course involve lots of drinking (I mean what is a night out, without drinking, right?). On average though, if there wasn’t a night out involved, my weekly intake of alcohol was hitting maybe 9 units (about a bottle of wine), which was respectably below the recommended 14 units for women. So, I was by no means a heavy drinker.
I started to notice that when I’d been drinking, even it if was only one glass of wine, I’d feel terrible the morning after. I’d already been experiencing increased levels of anxiety as a consequence of perimenopause, which thankfully HRT had helped to ease, but without doubt the alcohol wasn’t helping. And if I did go on a big night out, the hangover was lasting more than a day, sometimes it would take 2 days to fully recover, sometimes even as much as 3 or 4 days before my sleep sorted itself back out and I was feeling back to my normal energetic self.
All of this had been swimming around in my head and as a consequence I’d started to naturally reduce what I was drinking. But it wasn’t until a conversation I had with a friend on a dog walk that I started to consider giving up alcohol for good.
Getting Started With Alcohol Free Living
My friend told me about a book she was listening to called ‘The Alcohol Experiment’ by Annie Grace which offered a 30 day programme to make you view alcohol in a different way. She had been following it for about 2 weeks and it sounded absolutely fascinating, so I thought you know what let’s do this. I ordered a hard copy of the book, because I’m a traditionalist like that, and waited patiently for it to arrive, eager to get started.
Now, when I start something, I stick to it. Call it stubbornness, call it tenacity, call it what you want, but if I am faced with a challenge I tackle it head on. And because I am a blogger, of course I spoke out about it on social media, it’s what I do, it’s in my DNA to share with the world. So when I’ve put something out there, I’m even more likely to stick at something, cos this girl does not do failure very well.
The book was a massive part of my alcohol free journey and completely changed my whole mindset around alcohol. I’d given up alcohol before, doing the whole Dry January thing, or just having a break from it for the odd month here or there, and of course I didn’t drink throughout my two pregnancies. But always after a break, I would think phew done it and then get right back on it. I didn’t stop to consider why I was drinking, whether I even actually enjoyed it, and how perhaps we’re all more addicted to it than we realise. This book changed that.
It is divided into 30 chapters, with the idea that you read a chapter a day. And what I love about it, is that it is not in any way preachy. It tells you the facts, and then leaves it up to you to decide. On the back of the book it describes it perfectly:
Your Body.
Your Mind.
Your Choice.
And oh my days it helped me learn so much about myself and my relationship with alcohol, things that I don’t think I’d ever considered before. I faced up to the fact that I use alcohol as a bit of a social crutch, something to have in my hand if I’m feeling nervous, a means of giving me more confidence when talking in large groups, a way of fitting in. I do tend to lean more towards the introvert side of the spectrum and I have always felt uncomfortable in social situations, even if I don’t necessarily look as though I am. Drinking alcohol on a night out was a way of calming my nerves, making me feel more relaxed and I thought it made me more interesting because it gave me confidence to talk more openly, to dance, to sing, to act the fool, to do all the things that we laugh about the following day.
Plus there’s the whole habitual, ritualistic thing. Christmas, birthdays, get-togethers, nights out, family BBQs, relaxing after a hard day, work lunches, holidays… the list goes on and on of all the times we have been indoctrinated by society into believing that in order to have fun and to fit in with everybody else we must have a drink. How could we possibly enjoy any of these things without one or two or three cheeky bevoirs?
Were There Any Moments When I Missed Alcohol?
I can literally count just one time when I felt as though I was missing out because I wasn’t drinking. It was at a Christmas party that had been organised by the running group I’m a member of. I felt fine about the whole no drinking thing, had even planned ahead and taken my own bottle of alco free fizz to sneakily drink there as I wasn’t sure if the bar would have much choice. But when I arrived there were free glasses of prosecco being handed out as welcome drinks with no alternatives for us non-drinkers. It wasn’t that I wanted the prosecco, it was more a case of just wanting to feel as though I was part of the group, that I wasn’t standing out in anyway, that I wasn’t different. So for a very fleeting second, I considered grabbing a glass, to make myself feel better. But I didn’t. I resisted. And guess what? A few seconds later and I was over those feelings, I’d poured my own drink and I was happily chatting away to my friends.
I’ve gone alcohol free at Christmas, New Year’s Eve, trips away, summer holidays, birthday parties, nights out, I’ve come full circle through the year and experienced all of those occasions where I would usually drink. All without alcohol. And where before I thought it was the alcohol that made me interesting, now I know that I am far more interesting without it. I can still have a good night out. I can still get up and dance at parties. I can still engage and talk to people. If anything, not drinking has given me more confidence. I have just as much, if not more, fun. I dance better (or I’m at least more control of my movements anyway!). I definitely have better conversations with people, because a) I’m actually listening and b) I can speak without slurring, see them without squinting, and talk without repeating.
It has all been totally fine. I’ve found my alco free alternatives – Crodino is an amazing Aperol Spritz replacement, Wild Idol is for those really special occasions, CleanCo do an amazing alco free rhubarb gin that goes really well with Fevertree ginger ale, and honestly I’m just as happy with an Appletiser or a glass of tonic water or even some sparkling water. Because I see now that it’s not all about what I’m drinking. The drinking part is completely secondary to everything else. Now, I’m showing up for the people, the experience, the event, the atmosphere, the moment. What I have in my glass has literally no meaning for me any more. And I tell you what, that is the most empowering and liberating feeling ever!
A Year of Alcohol Free Living… What Next?
I’m sleeping better, I don’t get hangovers, my skin’s clearer and brighter, and I feel in control of myself and my emotions. Alcohol free living has been awesome for me and honestly I haven’t found it all that difficult. Certainly nowhere near as much as I thought I would. It is literally not even on my radar. I am just someone who doesn’t drink alcohol any more.
When I first started I went with the whole I’m alcohol free for now, but who knows in the future I may fancy it and that’s OK, never say never kinda thing. I told myself that I wanted to aim for a year, to go longer than my pregnancy, and to fully experience what it would be like going through every special occasion without alcohol. And as time progressed, I missed it less and less. To the degree that now, just the smell of it makes me turn my nose up. I don’t miss the taste, I don’t miss the social rituals of it, I don’t miss any part of it at all.
So I’ve done a year… what now? I’m officially calling myself alcohol free, I have no intentions of drinking again and I’m very happy with that decision. Well, I did tell you I was stubborn!
Have Your Ever Thought About Giving Up Alcohol?
Thank you so much for reading my post, it always means the world. Now it’s time for me to hear from you. I’d love to know what your thoughts are about alcohol and your drinking habits.
Are you up for a bit of alcohol free living? Do you feel as though you’re drinking may have got a little out of control? Are you questioning your reasons for drinking? Or are you simply sober curious and would like to explore more about going alcohol free?
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Author Bio
Becky Stafferton is a full-time content creator, web publisher, and blogging coach. She continually strives to promote a realistic, sustainable and positive image of how to lead a healthy life. When she’s not writing she can be found running through muddy puddles, making lists of lists, having a good old moan, talking in funny voices to her dog, renovating her house in the country, and teaching others how to make money from their blogs.
